G MPAA rating
Rated G - General Audiences

This article is rated G, meaning it is appropriate for all ages.

My Stranded Life is the fifth episode of Spongopoly, the fifth episode of season one and part one to the Stranded trilogy meaning the episode is not canon in anyway, shape or form.


The gang take a cruise ship to a tropical resort only to find a storm that caries passengers away and sends the boat towards a iceberg.


(Scene cuts to the gang on a cruise ship, SpongeBob and Patrick are at the front of the boat)

SpongeBob: Can you feel the wind Patrick?

Tom Kenny

Patrick: Wind? Oh, I've got wind!

Bill Fagerbakke

SpongeBob: Please don't!

Patrick: Just teasing ya, buddy. (Mr. Monopoly comes along)

Mr. Monopoly: What's going on boys?

Geoffrey Rush

SpongeBob: We're just admiring the wind.

Mr. Monopoly: I see.

Patrick: Have you seen Squidward, Uncle Pennybags?

Mr. Monopoly: He told me he went down to the basketball court.

Patrick: There's a basketball court?

Mr. Monopoly: Yeah, he's a basket squid!

SpongeBob: I wanna be a basket sponge!

Mr. Monopoly: Then I'll show you. (they leave and the scene cuts to some familiar characters sun bathing)

Colonel Mustard: How'd you get all the money to pay, Peter?

Travis Willingham

Prof. Plum: I didn't pay.

Benjamin Hall

Colonel Mustard: I didn't pay either! Scarlet, did you pay?

Scarlet: Why are you asking? (hides her purse) I always pay!

Reverend Green: Yeah, my baby always pays! Never take her money!

Scarlet: Green, we are not dating!

Peacock: Men these days. (they laugh as the scene cuts to Squidward dribbling a ball in what appears to be a gym)

Mr. Monopoly: (enters with P and SB) Here we are!

Squidward: SpongeBob! (catches the ball in his arm and walks up to them) We're almost there!

Roger Bumpass

SpongeBob: I've been saving my whole life up for this vacation!

Patrick: I... uhh... have been saving up my leaf... life up for this too!

Squidward: I can't wait! (a bang is heard) What was that?

Mr. Monopoly: Let's go and see. (they make their way up the stairs to the top of the ship where a storm is brewing)

Patrick: A storm?! (lightning) Ahh!

Squidward: Don't worry Patrick and you won't annoy me.

Patrick: I'm scared.

Gingerbread Man: Don't worry buddy, the storm will stop (a heavy wind comes causing him to fly away) sooooooonnnn!

Colonel Mustard: STORM! (runs around the deck screaming)

Mr. Monopoly: We'll be fine if we stick together. (looks ahead) We're heading for a iceberg! And it's summer too!

Squidward: You'll be okay, Squidnuggets. (gets out umbrella as it starts to rain)

SpongeBob: Squidward, no! (Squidward gets blown away by the wind) Squidward! No! (collapses to the floor) No...

Patrick: SpongeBob?

SpongeBob: Squid... wa... rd...

Patrick: SpongeBob! Speak to me!

SpongeBob: Squidwar- (falls asleep)

Mr. Monopoly: SpongeBob?

Patrick: SpongeBob! (the wind carries him away)

Mr. Monopoly: Patrick! (carries SpongeBob over his arm) Let's do this! We couldn't save Squidward but we can't lose you! (the wind carries Patrick around the ship) Hmm... (he runs around the fence around the ship trying to catch him)

Patrick: Help!

Mr. Monopoly: (jumps up trying to reach Patrick) I'm coming! (the wind spirals around the ship) Oh-no! (Patrick is seen flying towards a island) The wind is getting stronger! Our boat is in the middle of a tornado! (his cane turns into a witches broom and he flys to the island Patrick went to) Let's do this!

Prof. Plum: Wait for me! (jumps up on the cane as they fly towards Patrick's island)

Colonel Mustard: Plum, wait for me! Plum? They've gone. (wind picks carries him away) Darn!

Reverend Green: Mustard! (looks ahead of him) We're getting closer to the iceberg!

Scarlet: What are we gonna (wind carries her away) dooooooooo!?

Reverend Green: Captain! Turn us around this instant!

Captain's Assistant: (rushes on deck) Stay calm everyone, we can't turn around! The wheel snapped! (everyone screamed) On second thought, panic! (they scream as the scene cuts to the gang on the broom)

Mr. Monopoly: We're coming, Patrick!

Prof. Plum: Pennybags, the wind is getting stronger!

Mr. Monopoly: And we're running out of fuel!

Prof. Plum: We need more fuel!

Mr. Monopoly: But how?

Prof. Plum: I've got a... idea. (Scene cuts back to the boat where everyone is running around screaming)

Child: We're getting closer!

Dad: What can we do? (Scene cuts back to the cane where Prof. Plum is farting into the engine)

Mr. Monopoly: Are you sure this is hygienic?

Prof. Plum: It's our only option!

Mr. Monopoly: Can you stop now? I have to walk around with this stick all day!

Prof. Plum: I'm not done yet!

Mr. Monopoly: Watch out!

Prof. Plum: What? I can't here you over the dramatic music! (the music stops and the screen zooms out revealing a green screen)

Director: Cut the music, will ya! (screen zooms back in)

Mr. Monopoly: I said watch out!

Prof. Plum: For wh- (screen cuts to black and a explosion can be heard. The screen then cuts to a desert island. Mr. Monopoly and Prof Plum wash up on shore)

Mr. Monopoly: Where are we?

Prof. Plum: According to my calculations, we a stranded on a desert island with just us and our penises.

Mr. Monopoly: That's nice to know, where's SpongeBob?

Prof. Plum: (looks around) SpongeBob! (scene cuts to SpongeBob floating across the sea)

SpongeBob: (wakes up) Patrick! I had this weird dream! Squidward fl- Patrick? Guys? Where am I? I'm in water. Huh. I'm in water. I'm in water? I can't swim! (paddles) No! No! Please don't take me! Please don't take my butt either no! No! No! (a U.F.O comes) A alien ship? I must of drowned, dropped dead and know I'm- (the ship takes him as the scene cuts back to the island)

Prof. Plum: He'll be fine.

Mr. Monopoly: Yes, but what about us? It's not like there're other pe-

♪You're going down, I'm yelling timber!♪

Prof. Plum: Nothing like a coincidence, Jeff? (scene cuts to them entering a strange hut where everyone is dancing)

Mr. Monopoly: Where are we? (the chorus of the song comes)

Prof. Plum: Some coincidental place where we probably meet Patrick and the Minecraft Villager.

Patrick: Guys, you're here! Come on!

Prof. Plum: Knew it! (Patrick drags them onto the dance floor)

Patrick: (nae naes) Guys, you wouldn't believe it! Turns out this place is actually party central! (whips) All the cool parties are here!

Mr. Monopoly: So where's Squidward?

Patrick: (nae naes) He's at the bar! (scene cuts to the bar)

Squidward: And then he was like are you a kid or a squid? (thay laugh)

???: Tell us more, inkling.

Prof. Plum: Squidward, we have to go. (drags Squidward outside as Mr. Monopoly does the same for Patrick) We have to find SpongeBob.

Squidward: Ugh, just leave him to drown. He was a dirty little feminine dog anyway.

Patrick: I agree, except for the SpongeBob drowning part!

Mr. Monopoly: Don't you guys get it? He could be anywhere! Anywhere! (scene cuts back to the UFO)

SpongeBob: My friends could be anywhere! Anywhere! Gosh, I need to get home! Is this one of those two parters?

Director: Unfortunately yes.

SpongeBob: Looks like I'll be here a while then. (looks around) It's like a actual UFO!

???: That's because it is... (dun dun dun)

(credits, Patrick is seen doing the moves as brought up)

Watch me whip, now watch me nae nae. Watch me whip, and watch me nae nae. Now watch me! Watch me!

Patrick: This song sucks. (does the harlem shake off screen)


  • In early drafts, Squidward would be killed off. This was changed to keep the G rating.
    • The Stranded Trilogy is not canon so if he was killed, he would be alive in later episodes.
  • This is the first time the word 'penis' has been brought up in the show.

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