G MPAA rating
Rated G - General Audiences

This article is rated G, meaning it is appropriate for all ages.
Objectionable content includes: Two uncensored 'mild' swear words

Houston, We Have A Wormhole is the 13th episode of SpongeBob n' Stuff and the second episode of season two. It is part one of the 'Journey Through SBFW' story arc and is a crossover with Bikini Bottom Survival, Dunces and Dragons, Basket Sponge and a small cameo from Life in Bikini Bottom before it fully appears in part two along with Leader Plankton!.




(the episode begins at the Krusty Krab with SpongeBob serving krabby patties)

SpongeBob: Order up! I've always wondered why the order is up but who cares. (he walks over to the table) Here's your krabby patty krusty shake.

Customer: Thanks.

SpongeBob: (hands the customer her order and heads back into the kitchen) Hey Squidward, today seems like one of those normal days, doesn't it?

Squidward: What do you mean?

SpongeBob: Normally something exciting happens by now.

Squidward: I think by now is an understatement.

SpongeBob: Me too.

Squidward: Haven't you got patties to make?

SpongeBob: I'm on my break.

Squidward: I hate those four words.

SpongeBob: Why?

Squidward: It's just that you get breaks and I don't.

SpongeBob: How depressing.

Squidward: Oh, shut up. (Sandy walks through the door and goes to the counter)

Sandy: May I speak to SpongeBob?

Squidward: SpongeBob, Sandy's here! (SpongeBob comes out)

SpongeBob: Oh, hi Sandy. What's up?

Sandy: Oh, I thought you and Patrick could come over to my lab and help me test my new invention!

SpongeBob: Oh, cool. But couldn't you've just texted me?

Sandy: Huh?

SpongeBob: You could've just texted me.

Sandy: Yes, I could've. But this is one of those filler episodes.

SpongeBob: Oh, I see. But I thought people didn't like these types of episodes!

Sandy: Oh, they don't.

SpongeBob: Why do nearly all our sentences start with 'oh'.

Sandy: I dun'oh'.

SpongeBob: OK, (pause) can Temmie and Kenny come too?

Sandy: Why the rootin' tootin heck not! (we cut to Sandy's Treedome)

Sandy: Hi guys! Follow me! (she presses a button revealing a staircase)

Patrick: Whoa!

Sandy: Yeah, I have an actual lab now. (they enter the lab and walk through Sandy's invention until they came to a big mschine) You like my inventions?

Patrick: They're pretty sweet!

Sandy: No, they're inventions... Anyway, this is dimension hopper. It lets you hop through dimensions.

Temmie: like a frog?

Sandy: Not exactly, but you probably have the right idea. Anyway, it lets you hop through dimensions where we exist but do different things.

Kenny: (muffled) Cool!

Sandy: What I need you to do is test it. Unfortunately, only two people can fit in it so only two people can go. (we see Patrick in the machine)

Patrick: Cheese! (he presses a button and disappears with it)

Sandy: (sigh)

SpongeBob: What's the matter?

Sandy: Patrick just went to another dimension and with his knowledge, he probably wouldn't be coming back.

SpongeBob: 'Wouldn't'?

Sandy: Yep, that's right. (she pulls out remote control) I have invented this 'lil dongle which does the same job as the other machine but has little power. Therefore, we have to go through every dimension if we wanna bring him back. You see, it's easier to go to the next dimension on rather than the one you came from as it uses less power. There is no telling how many dimensions there could be though! (we see the to be continued meme) Oh, shut up! Fortunately this time, we all can go!

Temmie: well, we better get moving!

Sandy: For us to all travel together we must say the magic word.

SpongeBob: Which is?

Sandy: KKK.

All: KKK! (Sandy presses a button that leads them to another dimension)

Sandy: Wow, I can't believe no one else in the world said that!

Temmie: nor can i. say, where r we? (we see the 'Bikini Bottom Survival' title card, followed by the text 'November 2013 Typhoon Haiyan has been located in the Pacific Region and the worst have yet to come forth')

Kenny: (muttered) That was weird... (they turn around and watch the TV from the window of a TV shop)

Perch Perkins (from TV): Attention, all viewers! It has been reported just now that Bikini Bottom Institute of Science has confirmed that a super typhoon with an intensity 5 signal will be approaching the Pacific Region, ultimately affecting all marine and human life. Please evacuate immediately!

Sandy: Well, I don't think Patrick's in this dimension. We better get go-

SpongeBob: Wait! Look, it's me! But it's not me! (they turn and see the dimension's SpongeBob walking down the street)

SpongeBob (BBS): (walking on the street) Weather seems down today. I wonder… (A loud siren starts buzzing, while an announcement is heard from every corner of the town)   Mayor (BBS): Attention all citizens! Head on to the evacuation areas! Super Typhoon Haiyan is approaching our area. Mud, grime, and garbage will contaminate the oceans, please head to the evacuation centers!

Phil (BBS): Kid, hurry! The evacuation center’s just close ahead! (runs off)

SpongeBob (BBS): Oh my! I’ve got to get running! (he starts running)

SpongeBob: Run, me! Before it's too late!

SpongeBob (BBS): (turns around) Huh?

Sandy: Oh no! If he sees us the space time continuum will be destroyed for good!

SpongeBob (BBS): (runs over to the gang) Hi. Wait, you look like me! But you're not me!

SpongeBob: I'm you from another dimension.

SpongeBob: (BBS): Oh cool!

Sandy: Everyone say the magic word!

All but SB (BBS): KKK.

SpongeBob: (BBS): (just before they disappear): KKK? (they all enter a new dimension)

SpongeBob: Hey, I liked talking to me!

Sandy: You could've ripped a hole in time! You should be happy we're still alive.

Temmie: i wish i could meet myself!

Sandy: Now, that would be a good idea for an invention! Now, I can't see Patrick anywhere... (a time machine suddenly appears on Kenny) Oh my God! They killed Kenny!

Temmie: you (censored)!

Sandy: Is he gonna be OK?

SpongeBob: Yeah, it happened last episode too. (Sir SpongeBob and Patrick exit the time machine)

Sir Patrick: Cool..! We’re back in the past! (the 'Dunces and Dragons' title card appears) I need to change my FishBook Status to say so. (pulls a phone out of his back and tries to go online) N-N-No…

Sir SpongeBob: What is it?

Sir Patrick: There is no wifi!

Sir SpongeBob: Patrick you betta put your phone away before anyone sees it- (they stare at SpongeBob, Sandy and Temmie)

SpongeBob: Patrick is that you?

Sir Patrick: SpongeBob? (turns to Sir SpongeBob) But I thought you were SpongeBob.

Sir SpongeBob: I am. But wait, this isn't medieval times! Sandy's here too and there's a weird white thing...

Temmie: hOI!! im temmie! a that is quite racist actually...

Sandy: Allow me to clear things up. We're from another dimension looking for our Patrick.

Sir SpongeBob: Oh, so that explains your modern attire.

Patrick: I thought it was greek.

SpongeBob (BBS): (appearing suddenly) Actually it is quite modern...

SpongeBob: Yay! There's three mes!

SpongeBob (BBS): I think the correct term is three mes.

Temmie: why not three tems?

Sandy: WHAT IN THE NAME OF NEPTUNE ARE YOU DOING HERE! (sigh) I'm surprised we're not all dead yet. Anyway, we better get moving. Everyone say the magic word on three. One, two, three!

All but the Sirs: KKK!

Sir Patrick: KKK? (they disappear)

Sir SpongeBob: Patrick? Sandy? Anyone? Hello? (the gang enters a new dimension and they appear to be outside a sort of gym)

Temmie: woah, where da heck r we?

Sir Patrick: We appear to be back in Bikini Bottom.

SpongeBob: Well done-

SpongeBob (BBS): (continuing) Sherlock.

Sandy: Oh, for crying out loud. You decided to come along too? You don't know how much trouble we'll have to go through to get you back to you're right timeline.

Sir Patrick: But this might just be the right timeline, before your time machine messed up anyway.

Sandy: I don't know much about your timeline, but you're the one who probably messed up.

SpongeBob (BBS): You take that back! He's my friend even if he's from another dimension. Some type of typhoon has hit my dimension and I'll probably lose my Patrick. I don't wanna lose this one now.

Sir Patrick: Thanks buddy.

SpongeBob (BBS): Don't mention it.

SpongeBob: That is nice and all, but I'm part of the minority who wants to find my Patrick and get out of here!

SpongeBob (BBS): At least yours isn't probably dead by now!

SpongeBob: That's an exaggeration! I'm sure your Patrick is fine. At least you can go home once we find our Patrick.

SpongeBob (BBS): Well, maybe I don't want to go home.

Sandy: Calm down! We'll get this all sorted once we get out of here. Knowing Patrick, he probably would've entered this here build- (Kobe glides into the gym with the Space Jam theme accompanied with the 'Basket Sponge' title card, the gang peeps inside)

Patrick (BS): Aw man, I wanted Bill Murray.

SpongeBob (BS): Patrick, you've been wanting Bill Murray since the new Ghostbusters film.

Patrick (BS): That's one number I ain't calling.

Kobe: Sponge dude, turn that crap off. I’m dying from the 90’s it’s giving me.

(Patrick punches the CD)

Larry (BS): So Kobe, give us some important news…

Kobe (BS): I would be able to, but you’re piercing my nipple with your claw.

Larry (BS): Oh. Sorry about that.

Kobe: Anyway, I have a big announcement to give today.

SpongeBob (BS): (whispers to Patrick) I hope it’s bigger than Larry’s---

Squidward (BS): Oh shut up, you immature simpletons.

Mr. Krabs (BS): So what’s the announcement?

Kobe: First off, I’d just like to say- Welcome to Season 4.

Patrick (BS): Of what?

Sir Patrick: Wow, this must be one good year. It has four seasons!

Temmie: four seasons is da one thin we don hav!

Sandy: Please don't break the fourth wall.

Kobe: Well, keep in mind this is the same year that Donald Trump became president. It’s not that good.

Some Random Guy: But Donald Trump is awesome! Phillydan25 agrees with me!

Kobe: You better shut the (censored) up, (censored)!

Some Random Guy: My name is Kenny! Also, Trump is- (He gets killed by The Terrible Travis because he likes Trump)

Sandy: Oh my God! They killed Kenny!

Temmie: you (censored)!

Kobe: Anyway, keep in mind this is the same year that Donald Trump became president.

SpongeBob: I don't like this place, the humour isn't as mild.

Sandy: We just killed off Kenny a few minutes ago! And, well, that other guy...

SpongeBob (BBS): Move up, I can't see- (they fall through the door and the Basket Sponge cast stares at them)

Kobe: Well, this is unexpected.

Larry (BS): Stop trying to act surprised. We all know you decided to become the coach of this here team and challenge us. Right? (they all agree)

Kobe: No! This is literally quite unexpected! I came to tell you that I decided to-

Squidward (BS): Bring it on!

Sandy: Now, now people. We are not here to fight. We're from another dimension looking for our friend.

Squidward (BS): Sandy? (runs towards her) Oh, how I've missed you!

Sandy: This is awkward...

SpongeBob: She's telling the truth! I don't know a thing about rugby!

SpongeBob (BS): Rugby? Damn, Kobe. Your team has skill.

Kobe: For the last time, this is not my team! You're my team!

Patrick (BS): No, we're the couch's team!

Mr. Krabs (BS): Patrick, LeBron is dead.

Patrick (BS): And my life hasn't been as comfortable since...

SpongeBob (BS): Who are you kidding, Kobe? You're obviously telling us that so you're team can sneak up on us and-

Sandy: (literally jumping and landing on SpongeBob (BS)) FOR THE LOVE OF NEPTUNE! WE ARE NOT A BASKETBALL TEAM!

Patrick (BS) and Sir Patrick: This is basketball?

Larry (BS): Move, team, move! (the song 'Get Ready For This' starts)

(as the intro starts, Larry (BS) dribbles the ball down to the time travellers' side of the court where Temmie snatches it and kicks it like a football to the Basket Sponge cast's side)

Larry (BS): This is a nice team you got, Kobe.


SpongeBob: (approaching Kobe) Would you like to help sing the song?

Kobe: Of course not! Why would someone like me want to sing? (he waits a few seconds) Fine but only to give this show more screen time. (grabs a mic from SpongeBob)

Temmie: y'all ready 4 dis?

SpongeBob: (singing as the match continues in the background) Get down with the style, house on the ground, please when I squeeze, pump to your knees, who wants to play? I'm in here to stay, ready to take you around the way.

Kobe: (continuing) So get ready for this, mind your own biz, cause I invented the microphone biz, no need to sit, cause we're Basket Spo-

SpongeBob: (interrupting) SPONGEBOB N' STUFF!

Kobe: (continuing but keeping in time and therefore speaking over SpongeBob) Ready, ready, ready for this! (the game continues though the instrumental with Temmie saying 'yaYA!!' instead of the 'yeahs')

Sandy: (instead of the second verse, she spies Larry approaching here) Uh-oh. EVERYONE SAY THE MAGIC WORD!

The Time Travelers: KKK.

Squidward (BS): Anything for you, babe! KKK! (they all disappear)

SpongeBob (BS): That was weird...

Patrick (BS): I wish I had a couch to sit on...

Mr. Krabs (BS): So, what was it you were trying to tell us?

Kobe: Oh, I give up! (leaves and the gang ends up in another dimension again)

Squidward (BS): Oh, Sandy! You took us into a private space to do- uh... stuff.

Sandy: Get off me! I am not your girlfriend, I am from another dimension!

Squidward (BS): Oh, so you wanna play hard to get...

Sandy: Something tells me this isn't Squidward's usual character. Now, if I could just figure out where-(the camera zooms out revealing them standing outside someone's bathroom door) Oh s**t.

Sir Patrick: I don't get it.

SpongeBob: Argh, you just had to ruin the moment!

Sir Patrick: Huh?

SpongeBob (BBS): That was a perfect ending to the episode!

Sir Patrick: Sorry...

Sandy: You do know there was no way the audience could tell you two apart through the entirety of that.

Temmie: yeah, but dis isn't actually a tv show, is it? dis is just some crappy fanfiction on a website, they could tell them apart because they're only reading da transcript.

Sandy: How long left of the episode?

SpongeBob: A few seconds.

Sandy: We have to think of a closing line and fast!

Squidward (BS): I don't think it matters, as long as I'm with you!

Sandy: Can someone, like, please notice us now!

SpongeBob (BBS): Nobody will-

SpongeBob: (finishing him off) Until part two!

Sandy: S**t.

Temmie: it doesn't hav da same charm da second time around... (episode ends on a really awkward note, post credits scene: we see Kenny trapped in the middle of literally nowhere with a white background)

Kenny: (muffled) Uh, guys? Hello? (sigh) Now they've killed my reason... (the 'to be continued' meme occurs)

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