Rated G - Content is appropriate for all audiences

All episodes of Absorbent Days are rated G, meaning that the content of its episodes are appropriate for all user audiences and contain suitable plots, transcript, and overall features.

Heroic Discount
Series Absorbent Days
Season 3
Short 2
Airdate October 20, 2015
Written by MrScience12
Previous Episode The Search for Patrick: Part II
Next Episode Break-Out Band

Heroic Discount is the tenth short of the spin-off, Absorbent Days, and the third short of season three. In this short, SpongeBob and Patrick decide to purchase more snacks for the Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy marathon occurring later that afternoon. However, faced with the price of their haul, will they be able to enjoy the marathon after all?


  • SpongeBob SquarePants
  • Patrick Star
  • Cashier
  • Television Announcer (cameo)


  • (the short begins with a medium shot of SpongeBob's pineapple; the camera cuts to the living room, where SpongeBob and Patrick are staring straight at the television, Gary slithering in the background)
  • Television Announcer: Prepare yourselves, Bikini Bottomites. In a matter of a few hours, the weekly Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy Super Marathon begins! Relive all five hundred and fifteen episodes of season one in epic fashion! (the television cuts off)
  • SpongeBob: Patrick, are you ready for this?!
  • Patrick: Yep! I brought everything I had for this marathon. I'm more than prepared! (grabs bag of chips) The big guns.
  • SpongeBob: Hmm. What did I bring to this marathon of all marathons? (looks around) Uh, I brought Gary. (grabs Gary)
  • Patrick: Interesting choice.
  • SpongeBob: You know what, Patrick. These aren't what I had in mind for such an occassion. Maybe we should go buy some more.
  • Patrick: We?
  • (the scene cuts to a medium shot of the Barg N' Mart; SpongeBob and Patrick are seen, encumbered, as the two attempt to carry loads of snack items on their backs)
  • SpongeBob: (grunting), eh...Patrick?
  • (Patrick grunts gibberish in return)
  • SpongeBob: Just...three...more...inches, Patrick, the...register.
  • (the two slowly approach the register, and collapse upon reaching it)
  • Cashier: (sighs) May I help you two?
  • (SpongeBob and Patrick lift their items onto the register counter)
  • Cashier: (typing on register keys) Alright, sirs, that's gonna bring your total to $174.81.
  • Patrick: you accept Goober dollars?
  • Cashier:
  • SpongeBob: (looking in wallet) I don't have that much cash. How's about a "Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy" act of heroism discount?
  • Cashier: I'm afraid not. Now leave before I call security.
  • (the two slowly exit the scene)
  • Patrick: I guess the snacks will have to wait until next time, SpongeBob.
  • Cashier: Wait a minute! Did you two say "the marathon", as in the Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy Super Marathon?! (whispering) I'll give you that discount, on one condition: I see the marathon with you two.
  • SpongeBob and Patrick: (shrugs) Sure!
  • (the scene cuts to SpongeBob's living room, where the three are sleeping in front the television during the marathon)
  • SpongeBob: (snoring) Too...
  • Patrick: ...many...
  • Cashier: ...snacks.
  • (short ends)

Absorbent Days Season Three Shorts
The Search for Patrick: Part IThe Search for Patrick: Part IIHeroic Discount

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